When Life Gets Messy…

For the past few months we’ve had a lot of “stuff” going on.  Stuff that really grabs at your heart and makes you question pretty much everything about how you’ve done “life” for a long time (don’t worry, I still love and follow Jesus.  There is no question about that).  I’m talking about the kind of stuff that keeps you up at night and that sticks around through breakfast.  I’m sure no one else has ever had that happen. 😉

Anyway, I’m finding that after wading through those muddy times, I don’t want to “go deep”.  I do, but it seems easier to navigate Facebook or pop-in a really dumb comedy and laugh because my body is craving the high that laughter provides.  That old saying, “Laughter is the best medicine” really speaks truth after times like these.  The human body needs the chemical responses brought on by laughter, happy moments and overall good feelings.  I am so thankful that we can laugh, even if it’s because we’re watching Nacho Libre for the 15th time (awesome movie. Jack Black is probably my favorite actor next to Colin Firth.  Totally different, yes, but Jack Black can’t pull off Mr. Darcy, lovey-dovey feelings like Colin Firth and Colin Firth just can’t sing about Sister Incarnacion like Jack Black.  Both are necessary for complete movie-watching pleasure).

Back to the point.  Do you find that after a period of heaviness that you need to just not “go deep” for a time?  Like your “deep” bucket is too full and you need to tend to the “carefree” bucket for awhile?  That’s where I’m at.  I just want to ignore the hard stuff for a bit and enjoy life.  I think the hard stuff makes those lighter things far more enjoyable, so I’m thankful for them, but I’m equally as thankful for the light, fluffy moments in life.

I remember a time back in college when I was in a friend’s dorm room and we were taking a quiz on whether we were optimistic or pessimistic.  I have always thought of myself as a “glass half full” type of girl and was taken aback when, after saying so to my friend, he said, “Really?!  I wouldn’t have thought that about you.” Huh?!  Whatchoo talkin’ about Willis?!  Needless to say, I was a little upset at his comment.  I’m definitely NOT a pessimist.  I always thought of myself as more “spring” than “winter”, but over the years I think I’ve come to see what he did: I am a realist (smack dab in the middle of optimist and pessimist) who sees or expects the silver lining… perhaps more of “Summer” 😉

I think that’s what I’m craving right now: a glimpse of the silver lining.  Since I can’t see the future, I’m taking what I can in the present to make it give me feelings of “it’ll be alright”. Whatever the outcome.

Friend, I hope that when you have days, weeks or even months like these, you’re looking for the silver lining.  There is reason to keep your head up.  While life may seem muddy or just plain heavy at times, life doesn’t stop there.  Keep moving forward day by day, even minute by minute if you have to.  If you’re struggling to move on your own, ask a friend to walk with you.  After God created Adam in the beginning, He realized really fast that “It is not good for man to be alone” so He created Eve.  Life isn’t meant to be experienced alone, especially when it is hard.  Friends “bear each other’s burdens” and help lighten the load.  We need each other.

I went through a period of loneliness several years ago.  I wrote about it in my very first blog post here: (https://transparencyproject.net/2014/06/13/judge-not-lest-ye-too-be-judged/).  While I knew a lot of people and a lot of people knew me, I didn’t have any “friends” with whom I could do life with. I am so thankful that there were a couple other girls out there who were lonely too and were praying that God would give them “just one or two” friends.  Because they had the courage to ask God for help when they were lonely, He answered them and I was blessed in return.  That’s really all it took!  Don’t be afraid to talk to God about your heart’s needs.  When we lay our hearts before Him we are inviting Him to do life with us.  Life is wrought with difficulties and HE is the silver lining.  In our darkest moments, where there is guilt, shame, fear, anger or who knows what else, He is there.  He is our hope.  He is our peace.  He is our comfort.  And He wants to be invited in to do life with you.

“So I say to you: Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you.”

–Luke 11:9

(If you’re wondering what that means, exactly, a great resource is right here: (http://www.gotquestions.org/ask-and-you-shall-receive.html) )

Life is messy.  We screw up and have to deal with the consequences. Bad stuff happens and we don’t understand why.  God never, ever intended for us to do this alone.  He’s given us each other to do life with.  More importantly, He’s given us Himself.  Trust in Him.  Walk with Him.  Don’t quit.  He will not fail you.

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7 thoughts on “When Life Gets Messy…

    • Summer Wilson says:

      I’m so glad, Erika. Sometimes I feel like I’m posting to remind myself that God isn’t leaving me to deal with life alone. I’m really writing for myself, but so glad my personal commentaries are encouraging others 🙂 Thanks for the well-wishes. It’s going to be a long journey.

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  1. ohcripe says:

    Loved this, Summer. Being an analytical person myself, there have been times (I’m currently emerging from one, truly) when I just want to stop thinking and check out, seeking laughter as the best medicine for my soul. As I age (you and I are no longer in HS together, shockingly), I am surprised at how introverted I have become. As my love and appreciation for Jesus only grows, I also owe much of my strength to allowing my friends to love me when I need it most. I applaud you for sharing your heart online amidst struggle and encouraging others to reach out as well. Keep on keepin’ strong as you seek the silver linings.

    By the way, I appreciate Jack Black, too. So much! Jim Gaffigan is also someone who makes me laugh. Watching Singing in the Rain makes my heart smile, too. And I love that I can legitimately watch Holiday Inn this time of year.

    Hugs for you!

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    • Summer Wilson says:

      We’re not in high school anymore?! What?! Well that explains everything! I so often find myself telling my kids to enjoy their childhood while they can. It was so much easier, yet we never knew it then 😛 I’d say I’m surprised that you’ve become introverted, but I’d be lying because I’ve done the exact same. My time with people: time alone ratio has altered significantly since having kids. It’s better with the olders, but the youngers are exhausting.

      I love Holiday Inn and will be watching it this weekend. Already watched White Christmas and Elf. I think I’ll still throw in Nacho Libre. Because, come on. It’s awesome.

      Love you friend!

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  2. Grace Kim says:

    Sorry to hear that you’re going through some “messy” times, my friend. Let me know if you want to talk and we’ll go grab some tea and macarons. Love you and praying for you!

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  3. Summer Wilson says:

    Melanie, this cracks me up. Literally the moment I received your comment I WAS WATCHING THIS CLIP. My girls and I were enjoying the hilarity of Mr. Jack Black and Jimmy Fallon, our faves as well. I am now in the mood to watch Nacho Libre for the 15 thousandth time. Love you friend!

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